The story behind my latest tattoo and what it means to me:-
I blogged recently about the guy who quit his ‘successful’ big career to become a forest monk in Thailand. I recently read his book called ‘I may be wrong’ which was brilliant.
Well, his abbot at the monastery told the group of monks, including this guy Nathako, one night during his daily teachings about a mantra that would change their lives forever. He said when we you feel any conflict arising with another or even yourself simple say to yourself before doing anything ‘I may be wrong’ 3 or 4 times.
Then the conflict will go and you realise being right doesn’t matter.
For me, in my childhood, I was conditioned by my parents to be always right. It was like a badge of honour to be right and at any cost no matter what you had to do to be right and no matter what suffering was caused.
So it is a reminder to me when that pattern still comes in me, it does come still. Also, it is a recognition and a ‘hug’ to myself just how much I’ve changed and how far I’ve come on my journey and how far I still want to go.
This continued into my adult life until I learnt that nothing matters least of all being right.
It means so much to me to have that piece of art on my skin and I’m completely full of joy about it.
It’s all part of my journey to remove all the shackles that have held me back.
I increasingly want to have no opinion about anything. I know nothing and I really do not give a fuck about being right any more.
So, I am back, again. Back on the blogging horse after a short but needed sabbatical.
I am going to have another tattoo, big surprise!! You become easily addicted. I waited most of my adult life to get round to having one, even though I’d always wanted one. I finally overcame the fears, not fear of the pain particularly, just the fear of having one and ‘what if it looks shit?’ or ‘what if I don’t like it?’ and so on. Endless crap that my mind threw up to sabotage my soul’s desire to create beautiful art on my skin. I love art and all things spiritual, so I designed my own owl tattoo and the amazingly talented Mo set to work. I have always loved owls and see them as my spiritual totem. Then I had a raven, and thankfully Mo talked me out of my design this time for her amazing design. Of course, now I’m onto the next one…
I am going to have the words “I may be wrong” tattooed on my left forearm. This will be a permanent reminder of my new mantra…I have believed for a whole lifetime that “I am right” and protecting that at all costs. Now I am able to accept that I have a view, and usually based on nothing other than my mind telling me useless shit and then convincing me that I am right, based on nothing other than the fear of not having an opinion or view or knowledge on/of something and that view is just that a view, neither right or wrong, good or bad…just a temporary mental position that might change and is nothing very important.
I picked this tattoo idea up from listening to one of the many amazing fab Fearne Cotton podcasts, Happy Place, with Bjorn ‘Natthiko’ Lindeblad (check). He quit his amazing career as the youngest CEO of a company at the time to become a forest monk, which he continued to be for 40 years. He was taught the mantra ‘I may be wrong’ at the monastery as a way to avoid conflict. When you feel any conflict about to arise with another, simply repeat ‘I may be wrong’ a few times before reacting and the conflict always subsides, it gives us a chance to become conscious and step away from our ego.
Interesting, as a male, we are expected to know everything and it is a burden that we all carry. Society also expects us to have a view on everything and this was perfect for me as I grew up in a household where everyone had an opinion on everything and my father’s favourite phrase was ‘fact!! not opinion son’ for anything that was his view. Based again on nothing. He would have an opinion on mushroom growing out of season in Mongolia, if there is such a thing, even though he’d never grown mushrooms, or much else, and had never been to Mongolia.
We create so much conflict, suffering and damage battling it out with another person’s ego on what are just views. All views are just temporary thoughts amongst the thousands and thousands of usually repetitive daily thoughts.
When we do not attach ourselves to our opinions we release the need to defend them at all costs. The human race has killed each other in the millions just on the views of, or a group of, egos.
More and more I have less and less opinions on anything, I am no longer the ‘know-all’ and the defender of nothing that important as to be worth conflict of any kind with another.
So I am no longer of the ‘fact not opinion’ mantra and it has been replaced by ‘I do not know’. If it is really important to know, then, of course, I can do some research of my own or listen to others. However, my life journey has taught me that nothing really matters and very few things other than this eternal present moment that is now can be 100% true. Truth in itself is just an opinion and there are no facts.
Once you relieve yourself of the burden of having to know something or have a view, you reach a state of inner peace and freedom from the burden. We also release others from the burden of our knowledge and the lack of resistance to others releases the need for any conflict and suffering.
The human race would be in a more peaceful and joyous state if we knew less and had fewer views on stuff we knew nothing about.
Philip Dodson 