It’s our resistance to things that cause the pain.
Even more so when we are aware of something, we know that’s not what we want and then we get angry about being angry, or frustrated about being frustrated, or sad that we are sad and so on. We fight the reaction, we resist the feelings, we try to squash our emotions.
If we give space for our feelings, thoughts, emotions and let them be, just observing and letting it be there, then there is no resistance, no fight and they dissolve without more emotion, thought or reaction.
The challenge with attachment to our opinions is it means we have to defend them. If we are adamant internally that our opinion is right no matter what, then our ego is at stake and we have to defend them to the ‘death’. Well actually, very often it is literally to the death. This damages our relationships with others and causes us suffering within.
Opinions are just a view, a temporary mental form, and there is no right or wrong and if we accept that they just that and place no personal attachment to them, then there is no need to fight, no need to resist any other view and no need to experience any negative emotions when others do not agree with our view.
Surrendering to acceptance of things is not weakness, it is a strength, that you can let go and accept others and their views for what they are. It doesn’t prohibit ourselves from expressing our views whenever, however, it just stops the pain and suffering of defending our views at all costs and stops affecting our relationships with others.