Tag: worthiness

What happens when we tell ourselves the wrong story?

Posted on by philipdodson

All of our lives we tell ourselves stories internally based on what we think or what others think about us, even though in the case of others we do not actually know what they think unless they tell us. We take what others say about us or do to us and then we create stories in our heads as to what we are, who we are, what we are like, what we are good at and most often, what we are not good at. We create these lenses of self-judgement and create whole stories based on them.

The common thing about these stories is that they are not true, they are based on the temporary mental creation of others and our own minds, with absolutely no substance to them whatsoever.

From these stories, we then create a self-image about ourselves and then we think, believe and act based on them. Total insanity.

Even more insane, we do this all our lives if we do not wake up to the fact that they are utter nonsense. 

We are what we believe we are and therefore, we have the choice as to what story we are going to tell ourselves and what we choose to take from others. It does not matter what others think we are or say we are, it does not matter what happened before, it is just the past, simply that and no longer relevant.

We are what we believe ourselves to be right now this moment and when we are conscious and awake, we are alive in this moment now. There is no need for any stories then or roles to act out. We are simply being, being our truer authentic self, which comes from our soul and is not something that comes from the mind or the views of others.

When we tell ourselves the wrong story, we live an unreal, false life, trapped within our minds and the minds of others. We live an inauthentic life and we suffer from not being.

Critics

Posted on by philipdodson

When we come from a place where we look for the good in what we do and see things how others see our work we start to get even better at what we do. When we start with kindness towards ourselves we change the internal narratives.

We have been conditioned to be our own biggest critic and that comes from the mind and its fears. Add to that the cultural norm of ‘you can do better’ mentality instilled in us from our formative years in order to satisfy the egos of others and to prepare us for a life of servitude to working for others. It creates a default reaction of self-criticism and it is a shield we put up to ‘protect’ ourselves from the perceived judgement of others. However, this behaviour only serves to affect our self-esteem and causes us to suffer within.

We never feel inspired or motivated after beating ourselves up.

However, if we choose to be our biggest fan instead then we are proud of our work and we grow in self-confidence and we feel good.

It inspires us to build on what we have already achieved and to look positively on what we have done not what we didn’t do or did badly in our eyes.

When we focus on what we did well we free ourselves from the negative energy of looking at what we think we did wrong.

Lastly, we are all already worthy of love and belonging from the moment we wake up in the morning to the moment we go to sleep, no matter what we did or didn’t do that day.