The relaxation/guilt circle

Then, when we are wanting to relax, we feel guilty about the things we haven’t yet completed or need to be done. Also, in the industrialised world, it is seen as bad not to be constantly busy.

Therefore, relaxation time is far from that, it is stressful and time where we make ourselves feel bad.

When we are wanting to work, to do things, to take action, we feel resentful because when we were supposed to be relaxing in the evening or the weekend, we didn’t, we felt guilty. Therefore, we didn’t get time to chill and now work seems like a chore.

So, we don’t do the work and when it is time to relax, guess what? Yep, the same circle repeats itself guilt – resentment – guilt – resentment and so on.

To break it, we need to do one thing, create a time when work ends, and begins again, a shutdown. During the shutdown, we switch off work, phones, email, text, and so on.

If you are doing a job that is so important that you can not switch off for 8-12 hours a day, then change it, for the rest of us, there is nothing so earth-shatteringly important that it can not wait a few hours.

This breaks the circle of guilt followed by resentment. We properly relax and therefore we are fully supercharged to do our work, we get more work done and soon we have more time to relax.

What’s the plan?

When we get to planning our lives and setting goals we are focused on work and money thanks to the conditioning of parents, school, government and employers.

This is in the belief if we work hard, get promoted, earn more money eventually we’ll have enough money to afford the lifestyle we want and become happy.

Stop.

Plan to live a life based around what really matters, like friends, family, learning, adventure, love, kindness, sharing, giving without conditions, so things that enrich us and really matter.

Sure there is a need to work and earn money, but the happier, more mindful, living in the present moment we are, with great relationships, life adventures and spiritually good things the better our life will be and of course our work.

No one will reach the end of their journeys and say ‘I wish I had worked harder’.

Spend some time planning to live and then enjoy every moment that you are living.