The moment we feel the need to judge others, is the moment we have stepped into the criticism mode, the mind has taken over. We are starting down the path of reaction, of starting to slip into the victim/punisher mode.
We are looking to blame someone, we are looking to justify our own irritation, anger, frustration, anxiety with ourselves…all the things that led us to judge in the first place.
Always the judger is actually judging themselves. It is never the other person, it is always something happening within us that has caused us to react in the first place to another person’s words or actions.
If we accept that it is always within us, if we realise it is never anyone else, then we can be at peace, we can let go of others behaviours, pause and move on. We do not have to worsen our own suffering by spreading it to others.
We may not agree with another person’s behaviour and we can still verbalise or take action externally in response, but if we accept within that it is our state that causes the reaction, then we suffer no more within and we stop pointing the finger towards another. We put our point across from a position of peace and without the need to judge them.
Accepting what is sounds easy, but we are conditioned to want a different outcome to anything we do not like.
Our ego does not want to see or hear anything that doesn’t fit the story or if it feels like we are to blame.
The culture of blaming comes from the individual and collective egos and there wish not to be at fault.
If we can remove our ego from the situation, not look for blame, if we can silence our mind and its negative thoughts, then we can find accepting what has happened, and realising that what is, is always what is. It has already happened and wanting a different moment is, of course, completely futile.
Once we can get to the stage of accepting that everything that has occurred, has occurred, and we can not alter it, then we can focus on now and moving on, letting go and looking at how to deal with the reality of now.
Resisting creates fear that then leads to other emotions, pain and suffering. Inner peace is never achievable all the time we deny this present moment.
Letting go brings peace within and then we react from our true essence to things, from our soul, rather than from the mind, its ego and fears. We avoid becoming our emotions and reactions.
Everything is, as it is always, move on and enjoy now with peace within.