Victim and/or punisher

When we’ve been hurt by someone else’s behaviour or words, often the mind plays up and decides that our ego has been bruised, the self-image tainted, we feel that we need to enact vengeance, to get revenge, to punish or the opposite, play the victim and seek attention and feel sorry for ourselves. In most cases, there is a bit of both punishment and victimhood.

These games that we play serve no purpose at all, other than to perpetuate the victim/punisher role that is played out in the mind and continue our own internal pain. It is damaging not only to ourselves in terms of the suffering we unduly cause inside, it is also damaging to the people we inflict our victim/punisher behaviour on. It is not for us to judge and punish other people’s choices of behaviour.

If we stay conscious, if we allow the reaction to just be, if we choose not to be internally bothered by others and if we choose to just simply observe our ego and thoughts, then we stay calm, at peace and do not react out of fear and its other emotions.

That does not mean we have to outwardly accept others and their choice of behaviour, it simply means inner surrender and acceptance to what is, to accepting others as they are and to not allow suffering within from our ego’s desire to be a victim or a punisher of others.


When we regularly start realising that we have not been conscious and in the moment, that is the start of the journey towards greater awareness and consciousness.

The mind and it’s repetitive thought patterns, most of which are negative and sabotaging, are like a powerful magnet that drag us deeper and deeper into the unconsciousness, that is seen as ‘normal‘ life.

But the exact moment we realise that we are unconscious in thought is the exact moment of waking up and becoming conscious again.

Like any habit the more we focus on noticing our unconscious state the stronger our consciousness becomes.

Once we start on the path to being more in the moment, we’ll never go back to a life dominated by our thoughts.