The answer

Isn’t what we need.

Sure, it is what we are programmed by school to think we need.

A better question is what we could choose to be searching for.

Asking questions is the best way to learn, the best way to engage other people, it’s the fastest way to better understanding and it allows time for reflection and thought before acting.

Always having ‘the answer’ leads to talking instead of listening.

I could have…

I could have been…well, many things but I wasn’t. I could have been a contender as Marlon Brando said in ‘On The Waterfront’.

We make a choice in life and at that time there could have been many other options that we didn’t take.

The fact is, it is in the past and whatever route we took or take the outcomes are always uncertain.

Therefore, the could have, should have, what might have been thoughts we have is a waste of time. We only use them to beat ourselves when we feel we made a bad choice.

The good news is we can still choose a different path at any time and even if we had chosen the other path in the past it could have led to a worse outcome too.

It is better to accept where we are and the journey, learn and make new choices than it is to lament missed opportunities. There are no certainties so better to enjoy the journey we took not the one we didn’t go on.