Tag: change

What will happen if I don’t listen?

Posted on by philipdodson

There is always something to say, and we all have a unique journey and much to share with others. Our learning is unique to us as we are all uniquely different and what works for one does not necessarily fit another’s path. However, there are similar experiences that we all have and we can share learning and if wanted, we can share advice with others.

It is the unsolicited ‘fixing’ others type advice that is not what we want, we want people to understand us, not to tell us what happened to them. We are not interested and we want others to listen. We have to always seek first to understand, then to be understood. We have to be the first to stop the telling and do the listening.

Listening is not pausing to think about what we are going to say next. We have to listen to others in the way that we would want others to listen to us. Listening is something that we are poor at as humans, we are good at talking and mainly about ourselves.

There is one certainty, people who feel understood are more likely to listen to you and understand you. However, we can’t wait for them to listen, we have to be the one that takes the first step.

Whatever we want in life, we have to be the first. If we want more love, then we have to love more, if we want more trust, we have to trust more, if we want more hugs, we have to hug more, if we want more respect, we have to show more respect, if we want people to understand us, we have to understand more.

It is that simple, it always starts with us and we manifest the exterior world from how we choose to act. The world is how we choose to see it and is always a reflection of ourselves. We have to be brave enough to be the ones to change first.

Try it…see what happens, even within a few days.

There is an indigenous saying from North America ‘listen or your tongue will make you deaf’ and that is what will happen if you don’t listen.

What makes a good writer?

Posted on by philipdodson

Well, that is of course, subjective and all an opinion. There are no good or bad writers as with anything else in life. It is only our mind, or the collective mind, that makes anything good or bad.

However, like all things that we do, the more we do it, the more we get even better at it. That does not mean that each time we write it will be utterly amazing, more often, it will not be that great. That is the point though, we have to do some less than brilliant work in order to hone our skills and get to the work that is the best we can do. 

If we think about what to write then it does not come from our true essence, not from our heart and soul, but from the mind. We start to guess what others might like to read…an act of complete futility, no one can guess what others want, they often do not even know themselves. As Henry Ford famously said, “if I’d asked my customers what they had wanted they would have said ‘faster horses'”.

Therefore, the way to get better at writing is to keep writing no matter what, to keep putting the words down and to just let the words flow and not think it but do it. That means that eventually, the best words will come from the authentic you.

Just keep writing and writing and writing. Much of it will never be shared but the very best will be and that is how we become better writers.

Write for you not them.