It’s inside

Of course, we can look outside, but change and accountability come from within.

There are no other factors in whatever happens in our lives other than how we choose to react and what actions we choose.

The only element that is consistent in every single second of our entire journeys is us, we are there for every moment of our lives.

What we do is all that matters as we can not control anything or anyone else.

The more we accept and the more we let go, the easier it is to show up, the easier it is to give ourselves permission to be us. True belonging comes we when we are prepared, as Brene Brown beautifully says, to brave the wilderness that comes when we are truly ourselves 100% without fear. Belonging isn’t doing the easy thing and fitting in. It isn’t looking to others for change.

As always, this a journey, a work in progress and something that takes often a lifetime to obtain, but that’s ok because it’s about small steps to getting even better and staying a learner, not judging our own failings. Kindness to ourselves is a massive step.

It is inside us all, it’s a freedom what we choose to do.

Do to ourselves what we’d do to others

We would happily be kind, loving, supportive, compassionate and empathetic to a loved one, a close friend, even to just anyone.

Yet when it comes to ourselves we seem to struggle with this.

Think how we often speak unkindly to ourselves and then think of a person who truly matters to us, would we speak like that?

How we speak to ourselves is a choice, however, it has a huge impact on us. No one ever feels good about being unkind to themselves. Nothing is gained from it ever. So why not choose to be kind to ourselves?

Do to ourselves what we would do to someone who matters to us, as surely, we matter to ourselves.

If you haven’t tried it and you are fed up with anger, frustration and beating yourself up, try some love, kindness, understanding and putting an arm around yourself. After all, you have nothing to lose by trying.