Going back to the easy stuff

When we come across hard things we habitually tend to look for easy things to do instead.

We’ll convince ourselves we need a break, or that would be better tackled later when we’ll be ready. The thing is there never is a time called ‘ready’.

We will talk ourselves out of the hard challenges as it requires putting ourselves at risk and it is uncertain. We opt for easy. Easy is comfortable and brings instant gratification, a chemical feel-good fix inside.

The thing is when we opt for easy whenever we encounter hard things in the future we have conditioned ourselves to search for easy. It becomes a habit that leads us to shy more and more from risk, from challenges and it leads to the search for certainty and avoidance.

If we tackle the hard things, we create a different habit that starts to look for hard things and then we learn and get even better. Initially, it is tough, although 99% of the time the things are never anywhere near as hard as our mind will imagine them, however, like all habits it gets more rewarding and therefore sustainable.

We can always go back to the easy stuff afterwards when we’ve done the hard tasks. However, more often than not the easy becomes less and less appealing the same way the hard things do when we avoid them.

Going back to easy stuff fades. Avoiding hard things leads to nothing.

Staying stuck

Often, we choose to stay stuck in life because it is ‘comfortable’. Even though we moan, complain and say out loud that we are ‘fed up’, ‘can’t stand it anymore’ there is a comfort in what we know.

Coming unstuck means leaving the ‘safety’ zone even if we are in discomfort there. It means leaving shore and heading off to a new safety zone, one which abstractly we want to be in, however, there is a bigger commitment needed to make that journey out of where we are, across the unknown, to a place we are not certain will be better than where we currently are.

The biggest change comes from uncertainty, from being vulnerable and brave enough to leave shore and head to the unknown. The alternative is staying stuck, easier it seems on the surface but long-term a million times harder to endure and to break, the longer we stay stuck.

Hard as the initial breakout is, the longer we stick at it the easier it gets. Of course, we may reach our destination and it may be no better, but we will have gained learning and we have built our bravery muscles to try another journey into the unknown.

Risk and uncertainty lead to new adventures and opportunities.

Staying stuck is a choice.