Tag: Habits

Why does integrity matter?

Posted on by philipdodson

When we say to another person that we are going to do something and then we don’t after a while of keep doing that we lose our integrity and others will not trust our word. They will feel that we do not care for them and that we are not a reliable person who will show up for them.

When we say inside to ourselves that we are going to do something and we don’t, it is just as damaging, in fact, it is the cause of our lack of keeping our word externally. We then are not showing up for ourselves, so we can never show up for others. We can never genuinely give to others what we do not give to ourselves.

It always starts with how we treat ourselves, if we have internal integrity, then it will be replicated in the external world.

Better to not say we will do anything than to say we will and then we don’t.

It is a habit that is easily changed. We just need to set ourselves one commitment each day inside and then do it. Do that process for a week, and then add another thing, and so on,

Changing habits takes one step at a time repeatedly over a long enough period to form a new habit.

We are not broken, we don’t need fixing, and we are worthy always, however, if we want to show up in our own life and that of others, we have to commit to being true to our word.

Breaking the cycle

Posted on by philipdodson

We often get stuck in a rut in life. I have been recently struggling with getting up at a regular time and then sleeping heavily. This then means I miss an important time of the day when the world is still silent and there is a moment to complete my daily rituals that ground me, bring me into the day and help me to form habits in other parts of my life.

I used excuse upon excuse but I was causing myself great suffering because I was saying that  I will get up at 6 am and then not do it. That was bringing a lack of trust in myself, it was compromising my integrity, causing doubt, and negativity, and prohibiting me from doing the deeply meaningful work that I want to do.

Integrity is about doing what you say, not just with others, but more importantly with ourselves. We can not be true to others if we do not first become true to ourselves. Integrity is about doing what you say when no one else is there.

Of course, there are going to be times that we cannot always do what we say, circumstances mean that we have to change our plans sometimes and, of course, we can be compassionate and kind to ourselves when for whatever reason, we just do not show up.

However, if we make it a constant thing, that we say one thing and then do not do it, then we are harming ourselves and others. We are killing our own self-confidence and trust in ourselves to be authentic and to show up.

Our worth is not affected ever by what we do or don’t do, we are still worthy and worthy of love no matter what. However, we can bring a great deal more joy, purpose and energy to ourselves and others by living by what we say and by endeavouring to live an integral life.

It is better to not commit to something than it is to commit and then not do it. The best is always to commit and do it.