Winning

It is better to step away, let go and not seek to ‘win’. There does not have to be a ‘right’ or ‘wrong’.

Winning is a game of the ego, where there is a position to defend and losing is a catastrophe for the fragile ego. This often leads to a ‘win at all costs’ approach…whatever that might lead us to do or say. We attach so much to winning that we are too afraid to let go.

The challenge with winning is the cost and the damage both short and long term for you and the loser.

In the short-term, winning may feel good, like a bar of chocolate does, but after there is the down side, seeing what it cost and how it affected the ‘loser’. That in turn has a negative affect on us.

It doesn’t mean you can not have a view, or say what you feel, it is however, just your view and not worth the violence mentally and/or physically that winning inflicts.

Walking away

If you walk away from an argument, if you resist a fight, if let go even when you do not agree, is that weakness? Or is, in fact, the very opposite?

We see arguing, fighting, being opinionated, aggression, dominating others and so on as strength. We see being ‘in-charge’ as leadership. Perhaps leadership is actually setting an example for others to be inspired by.

It is the weakness of the mind and the vulnerability of our self-image that causes us to fight, argue, become aggressive, behave badly to defend the things that do not matter and are in fact not real, but a fabrication of our minds. Minds fighting with other minds verbally and physically, and to what ends? A winner and loser. In fact, all parties suffer, there never needs to be a winner or a loser.

What if we could see walking away as a strength, would we have a better world?