Theirs is much better

Others work, whether it’s cooking, running, jumping, art, singing, dancing, writing, music…the list could go on, and on, and on, is better than mine.

When we compare ourselves to others, we always pick are a person we perceive to be better than us, then in a self-deprecating style, we say ‘theirs is better than mine’.

This hiding behind criticising ourself serves two purposes, one is an attention-seeking attempt, hoping that another will say ‘oh, don’t be silly, your ‘x’ is amazing’, this helps reassure our fragile ego, and the second, is a total protection of our fragile ego, by eliminating the risk of ridicule for claiming that our work ‘is the best’. We do not dare to step into the spotlight for fear of judgement or failure.

The fact is, all of it stems from the mind, and attachment to our ego and the story of ‘poor little me’.

Our work is neither the best nor the worst, these are just judgements of the mind and collective mind.

Our work just is. It only needs to be better or worse to serve the story and to allow us to feel inferior or superior. Others work is the same, neither good nor bad. All of this judgement cycle just leads to internal suffering, which then leads to suffering for others too.

Be happy in the doing of the work, enjoy the moment and be content with what is, seek pleasure from creating what we love in our soul not what we judge in our mind.

Of course, it’s lovely, of course, it’s amazing, of course, it’s beautiful. It is whatever we tell ourselves it is and it does not matter.

We are all our own biggest critic as a defence mechanism, instead, we could choose to be our own and other people’s biggest fans. Do from the soul and not criticise from the mind.

Love our work, love other people’s work too. It ends suffering and judegement.

What did you learn today?

We often reflect at the end of a day, or even during that day on several occasions, about the things we messed up, didn’t do, did wrong, said wrong and then we can go back to the day before, the week before, the month, year…and so on. We can trawl through all the disasters and dredge them up.

What if we just asked ourselves instead ‘what did I learn today?’.

Maybe things would get even better, worth a try, as I am sure we’ve all been down the ‘beating ourselves up’ road and that doesn’t lead anywhere great.