Tag: Learning

The biggest kick in the teeth about change

Posted on by philipdodson

The biggest kick in the teeth about change is people, who have known you for long enough and before you changed, still react to you as if you were still that person before you learnt, adapted and changed yourself.

It’s totally understandable, and not that there ever needs to be blame, it is not their fault. You may have behaved a certain way for a long time and that is what people expect from you.

The things is, I need to be patient more patient and understanding with others when they do this to me. I need to realise that everyone rightly has their own pace of change and learning, and in fact who am I even to suggest that others need to change anyway? I am better off focusing on what I’m up to, as that’s the only thing that concerns me.

The only way to show that you have changed how you behave to others is not by words,and if you have behaved in way that you now recognise was wrong, then it is actions over time and repeating the changed behaviour long enough so that the people who matter, that we may have hurt previously can see that you have really changed.

I have previously thought, almost like buying a bunch of flowers, you can just simply make up for wrong choices of behaviour. It takes time, like everything, to demonstrate to people you are different. It means accepting having a kick in the teeth now and again, as I was the one who needed to change.

Just off now to adjust my gum shield.

One thing can lead to so much

Posted on by philipdodson

I tell this to myself most days, now…’just keep going, Philip’.

Patience, that’s something I have not had a huge amount of in life until more recent years. I used to think that impatience was good, some macho hustle, before my mate Gary Vaynerchuk made it popular. Acting on impulse and getting things done is one thing and a good thing, but not being patient enough to keep going, to gain the learning, to adapt, to test is a bad thing.

I’ve increasingly realised, it is just that, keep going with things, modify, adapt, learn, but most of all be patient, great things come over time not immediately. They build by small, unnoticeable steps, so momentum builds and builds, but always slow at first, but then the momentum grows and grows like a hockey stick curve.

Especially when you feel shit, this is when it matters most. On good days, we can all fly along, on tough days we feel like we’re wading through treacle with lead boats on. We all have shit days.Then on those days, try saying ‘just keep going, Philip’. It’s more like ‘I fancy watching Netflix’.

There are times when you will doubt this, I do many times, but I always remind myself, when I’m thinking of giving up and not doing something, that doing just one small thing to keep the momentum going is better than not. Often, you do that one thing and I try to make it small, you feel good, well better, and you do a second and third thing. Previously, I could write days off, weeks off, even years, through not keeping going, through thinking about the big stuff and giving in and looking for the path of least resistance.

I painfully learnt and realised that one thing might just be the thing you have been waiting for to go forward, we never know and that is why I have learnt to just keep going. Publishing one more blog, writing one more journal entry, doing one more piece of art, whatever it is.

One thing can lead to so much.