Don’t over engineer

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All too often in life we try too hard to make something happen.

Our desire to make something happen is very strong at times, even though the only thing we can control is ourselves. Yet, we many times get hell bent on engineering an outcome.

Most humans resent or rebel when their freedoms are compromised by others, and the more that is forced, the more we tend to rebel and the less likely the outcome, that the controller wants to make happen, happens.

We all would recognise this when we are on the receiving end, yet when we have that strong urge to get something to happen how we want, we then seem to forget all about that, and end up going head first into forcing something.

Don’t over engineer outcomes, in fact try hard not to engineer anything with a overly selfish motive behind it, as the best things in life happen naturally, unforced and out of serendipitous moments.

The more you relax and stop swimming against the tide, the more you are just yourself, the less you deliberately seek something.

Then we send out the right signals, and allow others to make their own minds up. It is better that the other person choices the outcome we want, because it is something that they are inspired by, not something we have manipulated or motivated them to choose.

This all comes down to the audiences we choose too, if you are surrounded by the right people, who like you and your values, then the are more likely to be inspired to choose what you stand for, and the less you will need to over engineer.

‘They’ say

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Nearly every question we ask ourselves inside our heads, we deep down instinctively know the right answer for us, most times we do not take our own instinctive advice.

I hear people saying ‘they say I must do this or that’. Who are ‘they’?

‘They’, well ‘they’ are the experts, the people who know what is good for us.

At times in my life, I made the error of listening to what ‘they’ said or what I thought ‘they’ were telling me to do.

But ‘they’ are not the experts, ‘they’ do not know what is good for me and ‘they’ are not me.

In fact ‘they’ do not even exist, we have invented them in our heads to justify, internally to ourselves and externally to others, why we do not do something.

Stop listen to them, stop invent them – ‘they’ do not know us, we know ourselves and that is who we need to listen to.

Listen to you, as you are the expert on you, after all who has been with us all of our lives, through every situation? yes YOU.