Echo chambers


In our echo chamber.

The ‘ignorant’ are in theirs.

In their echo chamber, they see us as ignorant.

Ignorance isn’t the problem. A different view is not ignorance.

Righteousness is a curse that leads to nothing but hatred, blinkered views and a stubborn resistance to listen, for a fear that we could be toppled from our thrown of being so fucking right and smug.

Leave your chamber, listen to people you believe are ignorant. Remove your own blinkers for a moment, listen without evaluating, the highest form of intelligence and something that we all struggle to master as we never had a single lesson at school, or home, or work, that taught us this skill.

Most of us are so busy trying to convert people and talk about everything from our perspective.

Come together, be patient, try to walk in a while in their shoes.

Hating, evaluating and anger has yet to work.

I know this from first-hand experience, where I grew up in a judgmental environment, with us or against us, black or white, no shades of grey.

We could droo being right and embrace differences, however opposite they are to you. It’s hard. 

After all, it’s just a view. It’s not about being right, it’s about empathy, understanding and civil debate to focus on a future even better outcome that perhaps neither echo chambers could imagine on their own. 

Alternatively, we can close the door on our echo chamber and destroy ourselves slowly with incandescent hate, anger, frustration and blind evaluation without even listening of the ‘ignorant’.

When we judge others, we are actually saying more about our own behaviour, struggles, and hang-ups than the people we judge.

I don’t know

For a lot of my life, I have been a bullshitter. I have had a view on almost everything from politics, to cooking, to hang gliding blind in the dark while playing the piano.

I have had an opinion on almost everything, this is a conditioning that men suffer from particularly, they are expected to know everything, ‘ask your father’. It’s seen internally by us men that you are weak if you do not know something.

It’s similar to this crap about always having to be tough and not show emotion.

I have been learning, hard as I find it, awkward as it is, vulnerable as it makes me feel, to say ‘I don’t know about that’.

I’ve realised that it’s OK not to know about fucking everything and it’s OK not to have to have an opinion on everything too. I am worthy already like we all are, regardless of what I know and whether I have an opinion on something.

Now, if I want to have an opinion, I am forcing myself to actually find out about something, by asking questions and listening without evaluation.

This is so hard, it is such ingrained habit, learnt in my formative years from a family environment where everyone had an opinion on anything and everything, regardless of the facts or actually knowing a single thing about it.

So I have been learning gradually not to bullshit anymore, I am learning to say ‘I don’t know’. Also, perhaps even if I have an opinion, I am choosing to hear someone else’s first before laying out my views.

I don’t know what this will lead to but I have enjoyed the fact that it is hugely liberating not to pretend to know everything.