Tag: collective

Facing awkward things together.

Posted on by philipdodson

I learnt that or this or whatever I struggle with in life type behaviour from my childhood and some of the damage that is done by our parents that we then have to spend a lifetime unravelling, why do we not let these things go earlier and get them out in the open?

As a parent, there are things that I know that I could have done even better or differently with the knowledge and experience I have now. But, I didn’t have that at the time, so there is no reproach, no blame, just learning, and learning how to make things better.

So now it is a chance to make the choice that every day is an opportunity to do it differently or even better to apply the learning. We can achieve that if we choose to and use the pain and suffering that the mistakes of parenthood can cause as the driver and the purpose to our life going forward. Not blaming or regretting or punishing ourselves or others for the mistakes, but doing an even better job, as there is always time to put things to a different outcome and a better outcome that both would like.

It is about discussing openly as a family and looking collectively on what even better looks like for everyone and this is a way of breaking the cycle so that if they have children in the future that they do not make the same choices and perpetuate the wrong outcomes.

After all, it is all subjective and opinions and there is not a manual on how to be the perfect parent, and perfect is dull and only momentarily achievable until someone surpasses it.

It is about doing what we feel is the right thing, but it is about discussing the awkward, the difficult, talking about the ‘elephant in the room’. Then being open and willing to admit that you were wrong, that you are willing to work to do things differently, or even better, and making it a thing that you work on together with your children so that they feel in control and part of the process.

Children can often help adults to become better and deal with their issues, it is not all about the parent teaching the child and that is what is wrong with the world, this view that adults are right and they always know best, often the unspoilt mind of the child is better-equipped and less cluttered to deal with things in a more practical and open way, naivety is a benefit, idealism is a plus.

Facing awkward things together and discussing how to make things even better is so much better than anger, blame, remorse and staying stuck.

Collective inspiration

Posted on by philipdodson

Clt5ZLFWIAAmfdN

Day 4 at the DNX/Betahaus/Copass camp, has only convinced me more than ever about the power of inspiration versus motivation.

Motivation is where you listen to a ‘guru’, usually, they are self-proclaimed, and they invest heavily in a manipulation machine to convince you that they are the number 1.

Sure, when they are bouncing around a stage, supported by loud music, shouting and gimmicks, promising life changing insights, you can get lifted by the collective hype and atmosphere. You walk out of the show pumped.

The problem with this shallow process is the only winners are the ‘gurus’ and you wake up the next day having to deal with your life and it’s challenges without your ‘guru’.

Having been to many of these types of camps, the thing I find each time is I walk away with inspiration, which is much deeper and longer lasting than motivation. It is something that touches our soul and heart. Passion and inspiration come from the heart, not from the shouting and guarantees of the motivator.

However, another thing comes into play with gathering people with shared values together in a camp for 10 days, not only is it fun mixed with work, it is something much more powerful, a collective of like minded people. The most important thing happens is you get collective inspiration from listening and sharing with others.

Today’s inspiration came from talking with Claudi of GreenMeBerlin, her ideas of bringing fun into the often dull, serious and evangelical pioneering of green issues, is a classic ‘purple cow’ as my mate Seth puts it.

We’ve had green campaigners for many, many years, and some have had success and others very little impact. That’s often because they have failed to make their story or mission appealing. Now that does not mean everything has to be turned into the lowest common denominator to give it mass appeal.

I discussed this recently with my friend Stefano and his point was that in order to get people to change you need to make it appealing and not preachy. Appealing means putting inspiration into it, something that ignites our emotions that drive our decision making.

Sure you can try and motivate people short-term by guilt, but longer-term that never works.

What I’ve taken away from this so far, is that these gatherings and the people who attend are proof that there are others in the world who share my values and passion for real change. It is signal that people want an alternative.

It is up to all of us who want that to continue to collectively inspire each other beyond the camps.

Together we can build the alternative we want.