Tag: behaviour

Shocking

Posted on by philipdodson

Shocking is no longer shocking anymore, we’ve heard and seen it all 24/7 on the media, social media and from our drama filled lives.

If your tactic is to shock people into responding and changing, it isn’t working, we’re all anaesthetised and prefer to look at fluffy cat pictures, pics of someone else’s lunch or play another level of Candy Crush. We sooth it all away with our addictive behaviours…food, sex, drugs, alcohol, gaming, gambling, TV and so on. It’s like water off a ducks back.

The thing that works is what we do to lead. For example, don’t be outraged by litter, pick some up, don’t be upset and post about how terrible homeless peoples lives are, do something to help them ourselves.

Words and shock matter not, our own action and example change the world.

As a famous person said ‘if you think you are too small to make a difference, try sleeping in a room with a mosquito’.

Getting back on track

Posted on by philipdodson

We are all human, we are not robots, we are not perfect, we all make choices that with hindsight weren’t the best.

Our initial reactions and our habits often lead us to go off track. It is not that we set out to mess up, no one ever does. It is often when we have allowed anger or hurt or any combination of emotions to cloud our initial reaction to being the wrong choice.

This in itself does not matter, what counts is learning to recognise that we are going off track, recognise the triggers, is then the next step. What we can eventually learn is to handle the situations that trigger these reactions differently. Still, though it requires one more thing once we see the triggers or we recognise that we are reacting badly, that is to get back on track by letting go, by stepping back and changing behaviour, by changing our mindset, by changing the reaction. It is the vulnerability to be able to switch from one course, that we know is wrong, and relinquish to what we know is a better choice.

It requires us to move out of blame thinking, it requires us to step away from having to win, to not being seen as weak by stepping back from an angry reaction. There is nothing wrong with making a bad choice, the damage is done to ourselves and potentially others when we continue to go off track knowingly and stay stuck.

All of this is not easy to learn and requires empathy and patience with ourselves. But like anything that is hard in life, it’s what makes a difference and it’s what matters. For me, this is an ongoing work in progress as someone who has had a lifetime of being right and having to win.