Tag: success

Should or could

Posted on by philipdodson

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‘Should’ is a commonly used word in life and one that expresses regret.

‘I should have known better’ – well you didn’t. ‘I should have said…’ – well you didn’t. The pattern will repeat for every ‘I should have…’.

Regret is a waste of time once you accept that we live in a determined world, that the choices you make were the only ones you could have made at that moment, based on your experiences, knowledge, mindset etc up to that point in your life.

What has happened has happened. No change can take place.

‘Could’ is a word rarely used and it expresses optimism, change, opportunity, and applying the knowledge we’ve gained. ‘I could choose not to do that again’ or ‘I could choose to say this next time’.

Firstly ‘could’ has more than one option and secondly it as all about something we can alter, shape and change – the now and the future.

‘Should’ in the past is futile. ‘Should’ as in the future tense is negative, limiting and applies a pressure to you, where ‘could’ gives us infinite options including not doing it.

Perhaps we could start using ‘could’ more.

I’m not cut out to be……

Posted on by philipdodson

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All too often we’re told, or we tell ourselves, based on some ‘truth’ that we or others have cooked up, based normally on nothing than others irrelevant views of us, that we are not cut out to be ….. whatever. A singer, a writer, a sales person, run, run our own business, climb mountains and so on.

For sure we can not be good at everything and certain things may not match our skills, experience and so on.

No matter what others will tell us or what we tell ourselves, we all have a thing that we love, that ignites us, that makes us super happy when we do it, that we are good at.

However, it does not matter what that is, what others think of us doing that or how long it takes in life to discover that one thing. Enjoy the journey of finding out what it is and no worries if you don’t, it does not matter.

As one of my favourite person says ‘no matter what gets done and how much is left undone, I am enough. It’s going to bed at night thinking, Yes, I am imperfect and vulnerable and sometimes afraid, but that doesn’t change the truth that I am brave and worthy of love and belonging’ – Brene Brown.

We are cut out to be us and it’s not about what we achieve, we are all, good enough, already.