The challenge with change

There is always someone who will alleviate your pain, tell you the answer, give you advice and so on.

The challenge is, no matter what advice you buy or get for free, only you can make the change.

The other thing far deeper than the mind and societal obsession with change, there really is nothing to change, as the real you, beyond the mind, never needs changing.

If we are genuinely us, then there is nothing to change.

A vicious circle of guilt

We have leisure time and while we watch a film, read a book, go for a walk, go to the cinema, see friends and so on we think about the tasks, chores, work etc we didn’t complete during the non-leisure working time.

Then we get to work, to our tasks, actions and so on and we resent the fact that we did not get relaxed and good leisure time, so we auto-sabotage our work and then the cycle continues because when it’s play time again, we feel guilty.

Often this is on auto-repeat through our lives.

How can we stop this?

Four things I have found that can help. Firstly set a shutdown time at which point work stops whatever until the next morning. Secondly, because of the shutdown, and once we learn to relax, we can separate work and play. Thirdly, when we are working remember the guilt feeling and focus on only the work that is super important first. Lastly, take small simple steps at work that are easy to complete and are not onerous or feel like a chore, that means we’re more likely to do it.

Simple, eh! Well as always it is a journey of getting even better and work in progress.

Four books I’d recommend for this would be Cal Newport’s Deep Work, Neil Fiore’s The Now Habit, Darren Hardy’s The Compound Effect and finally Brian Tracy’s Eat That Frog.