When we are unsure

When we are unsure what to do or what to say in situations in life, we often stay stuck or try to second guess what the other person might want or we want to avoid offending so we end up being wishy-washy and uncertain.

The best strategy is to be 100% us. What would I want the other person to do or say if they were in my shoes? That is the best thing to do. Say what we’d want to hear, do what we’d want to receive.

We can never second guess the response of others and some will like what we do and say and many won’t. However, the ones who like what we do and say will love us more if we are genuinely 100% ourselves.

Trust comes from being genuine not trying to please everyone and seeking to avoid offence.

Offending someone is the least of it.

Often in life, we avoid telling others something as we fear offending them or we feel awkward about being honest to someone.

I’m not advocating brutal honesty, that is just rude, shaming and not appropriate in a case.

However, just as brutal is leaving a person guessing or engineering a way to ‘take them out’ of the picture, without being decent enough to tell them why.

The options, don’t tell people and leave them guessing, be brutally honest and upset/shame them or learn how to give feedback and deal with situations that avoid offence, that is constructive and bring about a good outcome for all parties.

We are taught not offend yet that leaves the other person feeling rejected and uncertain as to why something happened.

This is worse than offending them as they have no closure, no say, nothing but the silence of avoiding offence.